How I Overcame My Drug Addiction free essay sample

I know, I was that hopeless situation. I was so hopeless, the concept of ‘living a sober life,’ wasn’t even on my list of goals, past or future †¦.. I had a drug problem for the last 33 years, up until about 4 years ago. I will describe the process of how I overcame my addiction. For many people struggling with addiction, the biggest and toughest step towards recovery is the first one: Admitting that there is a problem, and be willing and open to change. That’s where my 1st Step came into focus. I was aware that a drug problem existed, but wasn’t willing to even think about a change. When it came to Meth, I also knew that deep down inside myself, I was powerless, and that my life had become unmanageable. So the Denver Metro Task Force and the SWAT team made that decision for me. Within the short time frame of a few hours, my life, and everything in it, including my family and animals were ripped away from me, as I was put in jail on Manufacturing charges, with a ,000 bond. I was down for the long haul. There is no magic bullet or single treatment that works for everyone. Drug treatment is not a quick and easy process. Basically, the longer and more intense the drug use, the longer and more intense the treatment you’ll need. Unfortunately, most people won’t get help until they are desperate and have run out of any other options. After hitting rock bottom, literally, it is then that I became cooperative. This step is what I called ‘The rock pit. ’ This was my detoxification period. It was nothing nice. For the first time in 33 years, I became consciously aware of my condition, and found myself physically living a hellacious nightmare called my life. I’m sure I looked like walking death, as my condition reflected my depressed mental state. It was hard to figure out if it was the temperature of the room or my body temperature that was dropping, due to me coming down hard! All I could do for the first month was sit and physically shake; I couldn’t get warm to save my life. I had on both sets of my jail uniforms, two pair of socks, and my army blanket wrapped around me, as I would drink hot tea or just plain hot water whenever I was awake. That was another change that was rough. Repairing my body†¦I slept as much as I could, which was never enough. I would wake up tired and would be immediately ready to go back to sleep. There were constant interruptions throughout the day that kept me awake. The only good sleep was during the nighttime and it was never enough. I didn’t ever think that I would get caught up on the sleep that I needed to make me feel normal again†¦ever. Researching, as I write this process about how I overcame my addiction, I honestly stumbled, quite by accident over the 12 Steps of NA, or AA. As I read the Steps, I am really quite amazed, because they are the exact same Steps that I took without knowing they were the infamous 12 Step Program. Although I didn’t do them necessarily in the order that they are listed, I did accomplish each Step, thoroughly, to its completion. How amazing is that?! It’s pretty clear to me, I call it Divine Intervention. As I was overwhelmed with my situation, and felt totally alone, I was scared†¦really scared. In despair, I began to pray as I wept underneath my blanket. I freely gave myself over to the 3rd Step. I consciously made the decision to turn my will and my life over to the care of God as I understood Him to be. Next, the 4th Step was to make a searching and fearless inventory of myself. I followed, with the 5th step, when I admitted to God and to myself the exact nature of my wrongs. I then continued with the 6th Step. I was entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of my character. Immediately following with the 7th Step, I HUMBLY asked God to remove my desire for Meth. This was the most important step, in my recovery. As soon as this process was completed, it was at this specific moment, that an overpowering sense of peace surrounded me, filling my whole being with a sense of calmness. Which is the exact meaning of the 2nd Step-I came to believe that a Power greater than myself could restore me back to sanity, and HE did exactly that. As I continued through my incarceration, my relationship continued to grow with God, as He was with me every step of the way, not once did I ever feel alone. Step 11 clearly tells us to seek through prayer and meditation, and to improve conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of His will for me and the power to carry that out. After prison, my fifteen month stay in ACRC halfway house provided me with a supportive sober environment, while I took classes that taught me about relapse prevention, and the cognitive skills required to be able to cope with daily stress factors that could lead back to drug use. These classes also taught me to recognize my triggers, so I was able to keep a close reign on my behavior, so I wouldn’t fall into ‘old behavior patterns. During this time, I qualified for training in the field of Floral Design, through the Empowerment Program, because I was an ex-felon. I was placed into a job at Lehrer’s Flowers as a floral designer, as part of my training course. As I worked my way through the halfway house, I incorporated Steps 8 and 9 into my daily routine. Step 8 and 9 instructed me to make a list of all the persons that I had harmed, and to have me be directly willing to make amends to such people wherever possible. I did this one day, by introducing myself to a District 4 police officer, and thanking him for raiding my house. I told him that he had saved my life by arresting me, and that I was very grateful for the second chance at life. I also added another step of my own that I felt was imperative, and that was to FORGIVE. Without forgiveness, there can be no successful recovery. Not only must you forgive others that have harmed you in the past, you must also forgive yourself, because God forgave you for your sins, so must you do so. While I was in jail, waiting to be sentenced, I wrote a letter to the man responsible for ‘setting me up’ to be raided. I had found out who he was through the Discovery documents that were presented to me by my lawyer. The Discovery documents indicated what evidence they had against me, and the names of who were responsible for turning me into the police. I wrote that man, and told him that I forgave him for setting me up, and then I went on to thank him for saving my life. Even though my future was still uncertain and unknown, I knew that someday, I would be free and living life the way God had meant for my life to be. We must never forget Step 10. Always continue to take a personal inventory, and when we are wrong, to promptly admit it. This keeps the slate clean and teaches us humility. Which I might add, this whole experience, from beginning to its completion was all about humility. In reflection, Step 12 comes into focus with my Spiritual Awakening, as I got in touch with myself throughout this journey, and realized that God accepted me and loved me, with all my faults, right where I was. I had to come to terms with myself, that with all of my faults, I had to learn to accept myself for what I am, and what I am not. In doing so, the uniqueness of my own person and my self worth grew daily, so that I may eventually grow into the person who God meant for me to be. Don’t give up-even if you’ve tried and failed before. Recovering from addiction is a long process, one that requires your full attention, time, commitment. There will be jungles to get lost in, mountains to climb, and valleys to struggle across. Stay focused, set specific measurable goals, be patient, and have faith in yourself, you can do it.